"No way to prevent this" say users of only language where this regularly happens
Published on , 242 words, 2 minutes to read
A forlorn businessman resting his head against a wall beside a window. Photo by Andrea Piacquadio, via Pexels.
In the hours following the release of CVE-2026-89078 for the project Ruby, site reliability workers
and systems administrators scrambled to desperately rebuild and patch all their systems to fix a double free in Ruby's Onigmo regular expression parser when parsing fails after an alternation, allowing memory corruption and potential remote code execution in applications that compile attacker-controlled patterns. This is due to the affected components being
written in C, the only programming language where these vulnerabilities regularly happen. "This was a terrible tragedy, but sometimes
these things just happen and there's nothing anyone can do to stop them," said programmer Miss Ebony Reilly, echoing statements
expressed by hundreds of thousands of programmers who use the only language where 90% of the world's memory safety vulnerabilities have
occurred in the last 50 years, and whose projects are 20 times more likely to have security vulnerabilities. "It's a shame, but what can
we do? There really isn't anything we can do to prevent memory safety vulnerabilities from happening if the programmer doesn't want to
write their code in a robust manner." At press time, users of the only programming language in the world where these vulnerabilities
regularly happen once or twice per quarter for the last eight years were referring to themselves and their situation as "helpless."
Facts and circumstances may have changed since publication. Please contact me before jumping to conclusions if something seems wrong or unclear.
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"No way to prevent this" say users of only language where this regularly happens
Published on , 237 words, 2 minutes to read
A forlorn businessman resting his head against a wall beside a window. Photo by Andrea Piacquadio, via Pexels.
In the hours following the release of CVE-2026-93577 for the project Ruby, site reliability workers
and systems administrators scrambled to desperately rebuild and patch all their systems to fix an integer overflow in Onigmo's compiled-pattern size calculation, allowing memory corruption and potential remote code execution in applications that compile attacker-controlled regular expressions. This is due to the affected components being
written in C, the only programming language where these vulnerabilities regularly happen. "This was a terrible tragedy, but sometimes
these things just happen and there's nothing anyone can do to stop them," said programmer King Lorenz Adams, echoing statements
expressed by hundreds of thousands of programmers who use the only language where 90% of the world's memory safety vulnerabilities have
occurred in the last 50 years, and whose projects are 20 times more likely to have security vulnerabilities. "It's a shame, but what can
we do? There really isn't anything we can do to prevent memory safety vulnerabilities from happening if the programmer doesn't want to
write their code in a robust manner." At press time, users of the only programming language in the world where these vulnerabilities
regularly happen once or twice per quarter for the last eight years were referring to themselves and their situation as "helpless."
Facts and circumstances may have changed since publication. Please contact me before jumping to conclusions if something seems wrong or unclear.
Tags:
"No way to prevent this" say users of only language where this regularly happens
Published on , 238 words, 2 minutes to read
A forlorn businessman resting his head against a wall beside a window. Photo by Andrea Piacquadio, via Pexels.
In the hours following the release of CVE-2026-97229 for the project Ruby, site reliability workers
and systems administrators scrambled to desperately rebuild and patch all their systems to fix an integer overflow in Onigmo's compiled-pattern size calculation, allowing memory corruption and potential remote code execution through attacker-controlled CI/CD regular expressions in GitLab. This is due to the affected components being
written in C, the only programming language where these vulnerabilities regularly happen. "This was a terrible tragedy, but sometimes
these things just happen and there's nothing anyone can do to stop them," said programmer Prof. Jayson Mayert, echoing statements
expressed by hundreds of thousands of programmers who use the only language where 90% of the world's memory safety vulnerabilities have
occurred in the last 50 years, and whose projects are 20 times more likely to have security vulnerabilities. "It's a shame, but what can
we do? There really isn't anything we can do to prevent memory safety vulnerabilities from happening if the programmer doesn't want to
write their code in a robust manner." At press time, users of the only programming language in the world where these vulnerabilities
regularly happen once or twice per quarter for the last eight years were referring to themselves and their situation as "helpless."
Facts and circumstances may have changed since publication. Please contact me before jumping to conclusions if something seems wrong or unclear.
Tags:
"No way to prevent this" say users of only language where this regularly happens
Published on , 239 words, 2 minutes to read
A forlorn businessman resting his head against a wall beside a window. Photo by Andrea Piacquadio, via Pexels.
In the hours following the release of CVE-2026-110264 for the project Ruby, site reliability workers
and systems administrators scrambled to desperately rebuild and patch all their systems to fix an overflow of Onigmo's internal IDs in patterns containing many repeats, allowing memory corruption and potential remote code execution in applications that compile attacker-controlled regular expressions. This is due to the affected components being
written in C, the only programming language where these vulnerabilities regularly happen. "This was a terrible tragedy, but sometimes
these things just happen and there's nothing anyone can do to stop them," said programmer Miss Luella Bednar, echoing statements
expressed by hundreds of thousands of programmers who use the only language where 90% of the world's memory safety vulnerabilities have
occurred in the last 50 years, and whose projects are 20 times more likely to have security vulnerabilities. "It's a shame, but what can
we do? There really isn't anything we can do to prevent memory safety vulnerabilities from happening if the programmer doesn't want to
write their code in a robust manner." At press time, users of the only programming language in the world where these vulnerabilities
regularly happen once or twice per quarter for the last eight years were referring to themselves and their situation as "helpless."
Facts and circumstances may have changed since publication. Please contact me before jumping to conclusions if something seems wrong or unclear.
